So this particular post comes for a very specific reason, and with a very specific situation. I want to face the issues and problems that can come from going behind the back of anyone head on. Please read through my situation, and see if you have been in my place.Gossip is a disease that runs rampant in most church circles, and DEFINITELY doesn't stop short of my own church community. I am on this never ending journey to find out what it looks like to live the reckless and thoughtful life of Jesus Christ, and a trait that I can definitely see in man of Christ is the ability to come strait to anyone with whom you may have a problem with.
Never speak negatively about someone behind their back.
If the intent you have may cause any negative rebounds toward anyone involved you should rethink your approach IMMEDIATELY.
Why?
Because gossip destroys community.
Matthew 18:15-17 says:
15"If your brother sins against you,[b] go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.'[c] 17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church
If that is still hard to understand, then I will translate it into the AFIV (The Adam Flora International Version) ... It says if someone "disses you" in any way, go tell him "what's up". If he's still being "wack," get help from a mentor or MUTUAL AND UNBIASED FRIEND. If he's still being wack, then seek guidance from Preach.
NOW, My reason for speaking on this subject. I have a personal experience that was in my face tonight, and if not handled correctly could have created much conflict and fighting. So I want to be real, and face a problem head on.
I am NOT going to claim that I am perfect, or that I don't ever speak in a way that could harm someone. I am not even close. I just hope through situations like this one that I can stray just a bit farther from something so dangerous.
1 comments:
Dude,
You are obviously hurt - cut real deep. To blog about this before six in the morning....
First of all, I will agree that gossip is evil. There's no doubt that it tears apart community. There's no doubt that it destroys friendships. There's no doubt just plain sucks.
I'm not quite sure that I agree that this is the best place to air the dirty laundry - so to speak. I don't know the situation first hand (other than what you wrote), but here's my experience: Often it takes a bigger man to either approach the gossip offenders face-to-face with your concerns or to offer grace and forgiveness in the midst of such pain.
I'm convinced that this is the model that Christ left for us. Despite being beaten and bruised and spit on and whipped and mocked and crucified, he forgave. Whoa!
I don't mean to get in your face, but I thought I would share a few of my thoughts. I absolutely enjoy reading your blog - keep it up.
Jon
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