Until next time Matt Silver...

Brian Jones said it best when he said that this isn't Matt leaving, but us Sending out Matt to do what God has built him to do. As hard as it is to accept, I couldn't agree with him more. Over the 5 years I have gotten to know Matt, I have grown more than I ever imagined. So in honor of Mr. Silver, I thought I would dedicate this blog to Matt, and...



THE TEN THINGS I WILL MISS THE MOST ABOUT MATT SILVER!

1) The Matt Wave
-If you know Matt Silver you know about the well... flagrant wave that Matt does to say hello, it's almost like how someone would hold a sock puppet, and he twinkles his fingers. If you know what I am talking about than you are laughing hysterically, if not, than you probably think I am crazy.

2) The Matt Silver Patented Serious Face
-If you have been in Matt's group for a few years you know the face Matt makes when he is dead serious or angry. If you know Matt, this is one of the scariest things you will see in a lifetime. Watch out for the Matt Scary Face.

3) Wrestling
-If you are a GUY from Matt's ministry, than you have tried to fight Matt at one given time. I say tried because Matt is wayyyy tougher than he looks, and you will lose. I only witnessed Matt tap out once to Nick Bonavita, the captain of our wrestling team in highschool. They only tapped out because they were out of breath after rolling around for 10 minutes.

4) C.I.Y.
-If you've gone on a CIY trip with Matt, then you have really seen him shine. Silver loves to get to know people on a much higher level. Most likely the closest any of us have ever felt with Matt was on one of these trips. It was on these very trips that Matt Baptized me only a handful of years ago.

5) Advice
- If you've ever made a bad decision, you can bet that Matt was there to offer better advice than mostly anyone else could give you. Matt got me through some really rough spots in my walk, in my relationship, with my family, with my school, and basically with any hard spot I've ever hit. He was always there to offer guidance. Thats what makes Matt not just a mentor, but a friend. I hope to come back to Matt and Carrie one day with my wife when I am older, and thank them even more then.

6) The crack
- "There is a crack in my bed", and that is what I will really miss about Silver. For the most part you will not really understand this one unless YOU are Matt Silver. ahhh, good times.

7) Yeahhhhh BOY
- You old school Rioters will know exactly what I am talking about. The yeah boys, and the Matt Silver Dialect will live on for years and years. I can still hear the yeah boys being yelled out for years to come. "thas niceeeee"

8) Late Nights
- I WAS the "that guy" of the youth group at one given time. Matt recognized from the first second I walked into youth group that I will take a little extra time and patience. Matt hung out with me at Riot hours after everyone else left. He stayed hours after I was even legally allowed to be out. We talked about everything. These are the weeks that Matt was Jesus to me. Who knows if I'd be here if it wasn't for these long nights.

9) Opportunities
- Matt believed in me. He believed I would succeed in ministry, even when even I sometimes doubted that. He trusted me to give the message to over 150 riot and impact students. That is an incredible responsibility that not everyone gets trusted with. I think I yelled at Matt Silver the first time he asked me about God. We were in a pizza shop just chillin'. Now look where we are. It's incredible.

10) A friend.
-Not only was Matt a great youth pastor for all of us, but he was an even better friend. When you hung out with Matt you never really knew what to expect, but you knew he was going to make you laugh somehow. We watched Matt grow from a crazy prankster to an incredible father right in front of our eyes. Whether it was laughing or crying we can all admit that although we will see Matt again we will always cherish Matt's heart. It will live on in all of us. Going on in the future, who knows when a youth group of my own will meet up with his in some random part of the world. Matt always called me a "life friend". A friend that you will always have whether you like it or not. Well I tell you what, I look forward to it...

A piece of history

So as many of you are surely aware of, the Democratic process to pick a nominee to represent the party has been quite a battle. You have Barack Obama, a symbol of hope, but also inexperience. And then you have Hillary Clinton, a symbol of Experience but distrust. And then you have them both attacking the Republican Nominee John McCain, stating "we don't need a 3rd term of George Bush."

I must admit, that throughout this election I have gotten more than interested. I watch CNN pretty much every day to support my candidate of interest Barack Obama. I run into some very large pros and cons that I occasionally am not sure how to handle.

The Cons - His liberal stance. I really like what he stands for and what he represents and how he presents himself and his solutions for this country. However, can I support a candidate who clearly does not oppose abortion? I know many people of faith love to get fired up on politics when someone doesn't back pro-life. However, what if I believed that my candidate would save more lives with his good stance on health care, defense and the economy? I mean, no matter who gets elected, r0e vs. wade will never get overturned.

The Pros - From the start Barack Obama has been a symbol of HOPE for everyone. I have never heard a speaker who can get such a crowed fired up with the point that our country is going in the wrong direction, and He is the one to do something about it. He will fight the race barrier and the inexperience barrier to prove that we together as a people can change this world.

Curiosity finally got the best of me when I decided to head to a rally in the City. I went to hear him speak in front of the historic mile in between the constitution center, the liberty bell and town hall. Me and 35,000 others screamed out O-BA-MA as "Will I AM" from the black eyed peas sang "Where is the Love". As you can guess I was standing up on a platform starting the chant myself with the cool sign my lovely girlfriend got for me. I waited for 4 hours to hear a 25 minute speech. This was the largest Obama rally in history, right where it all began in Philly. Perhaps one day that speech, and this man will be a huge part of our history. Feel free to share your thoughts.

The Key to Contentment... Well... Keys.

I'm not sure how I've done it, but I truly have found the key to being happy in life... I mean truly happy in life. Well, I guess I narrowed it down to a few key points that I think can completely change your life if you are honest with yourself. Many go their whole lives without ever truly being content. We chase all of these things to make us content, but we never quite get there. If we just get those grades, then man, we will get into that school. If we get that GPA in that certain major then I can land that perfect job. Then when I have that job I can buy myself all kind of stuff, and I can provide for my family. Then they will love me more, and I can be happy with them and all of my stuff. You know what. I say we cut out all of the middle men and just strive for contentment going strait to the source... God. That doesn't come easy, but I think there is a way to get there.

The first thing we need to do is to really get to know ourselves. This is a vital thing that many forget before they walk into ministry, or even before they start to walk with the Lord period. It's really next to impossible to figure out how God is going to play into your life and heart if you're not even sure who you are to begin with. It sets the building blocks of confidence. You can't be confident in God if you don't know at the core of your being who you are. Find out what your passions are. Get to a point where you don't feel you have to succumb to pressures of other people. Be comfortable in your own shoes, and be proud of that.

The next thing you need to do is Chase God. What I mean by that is you should try to seek God's face as much as possible. Try to learn who Jesus Christ really is. Seek as much knowledge as possible. You will never figure God out, because he is outside of the reality that we look from. But the more and more you learn, the better you will be able to configure what you really do believe. In turn this will help you learn more about yourself as part of the first part. One of the best ways to do this is to stick with many people with more wisdom than you. Those who are in leadership in your church or those who have been walking with the Lord for many years always have something useful to give to you. Another way to seek knowledge is of course my reading scripture. You really need to be pursuing the word, and being okay if it doesn't speak to you at that very time. It will eventually if you allow it. I promise.

The last thing, and of course the most difficult thing that will get us to true contentment, is true submission. I need to be honest, this kind of submission isn't easy, but it is what we need to strive for. This is the submission that means humbling down and sacrificing our wants for the joy of others. This submission means not always getting your way. This submission means doing what you feel God wants you to, even if it well... sucks. That is where the catch is. Complete submission will be the most difficult yet most gratifying thing you can possibly do with your relationship with God. If you do those first two steps, then finally hand your heart to God to take care of, He will guard it and make it grow. You will find joy in things you never thought you would find joy in. You will be a Christian like Jesus Christ intended you to be. The hard part is complete submission has a lot of aspects to it. You have your spiritual disciplines of prayer, scripture, meditation and many others. Also have to submit to who God thinks should or should NOT be in your life. You may also have to submit to where he wants you to go, and what he wants you to do. This may not always line up with your plans or hopes, but if you truly are following Him, it will be right where you are supposed to be.

Obviously there is a whole lot more to this whole system. This is only the icing on the cake, but if I were asked right now, "Adam, I want to be happy, I want to be content with life... what should I do..." Well then, now you know my answer.

We all have hobbies... right?

So from time to time the norm just becomes a little too... well... normal. Perhaps a little excitement in something in our lives would just give us that little kick start that we need to have. Maybe thats why we have hobbies. Perhaps we have hobbies that are passed down from our parents. Dad played in the marching band, and decided to pass down his beloved trumpet to you. Maybe you are influenced by the people you are around. A coworker decides he wants to hit the tennis courts, you think he's a cool guy, so you tag along. We all have some type of hobby whether you know it or not.

I recently picked up a few hobbies for the reason that I just wanted to try something new! I started off by acquiring a quite large fish tank and stand. I had a good ol' time setting it all up and adding a whopping 40 gallons of water and 4 very little starter fish. This is cool to me because well, I hate pets. I figured this was the next best thing. You know that feeling you get when your dog comes and sits on your lap, well yeah, I get that when my fish come to the top to eat... kinda. So either way, it has been interesting maintaining the tank and trying to find new fish or turtles or frogs to put into my tank to be my new friends.

Another hobby I recently picked up is guitar. I started my first acoustic guitar lessons about a week ago, and am leasing a sweet Carlo Robelli to practice on. I really love music, and I have always admired the abilities of some of my favorite artists such as John Mayer or Jack Johnson to just turn a piece of wood into the most relaxing sounds on earth. Perhaps if I stick with it, I may get good at it! I already did the drum thing, so it will be cool to be a little more well rounded.

All of this to bring up the question, what kind of hobbies did Jesus have? We all think we know Jesus so well, but at times when I ask questions like that it's easy to feel distant. I think at the same time it makes him feel more like a human who had likes and dislikes. I can picture Jesus walking from town to town, or just kickin' it with the disciples. Did he play the sports they played in his time, or was he always in studying scripture (he was extremely proficient with scripture) because thats what students desiring to be a rabbi or teacher did? Did Jesus love to ride boats, or is it just how he got around along with his fisherman followers?

A lot of times it's hard to relate to Jesus because of the mask that we put on him. We always see him so stern or Mr. Rogers-like. I figured it was worth while to step outside the box a little and wonder what hobbies did the man who give His life for us have. I mean, can you count walking on water as a hobby?

And Finally Some Answers

I could never ever explain how this last month has turned and twisted to completely reveal how overwhelmingly good our God is. So I left you off with my thoughts coming out of returning home from Fiji. It was a really hard task to come home to so many people who will never quite understand why I even came home to begin with. As I expected I immediately received some words of doubt. I had to listen to people with lots of wisdom whom I looked up to very much tell me very honestly that they believe I made a wrong decision and acted off of emotions. That is hard to listen even if you know they are wrong. I almost convinced myself they were right, then quickly reverted back to the fact that it was a very real thing and they will never understand what was laid on my heart that day. On the other side of things I did receive lots of praise for trusting God even if it makes no sense. Trusting God even if it means losing credits, losing money, and having some question your integrity. So as you can see a little bit of mixed emotions. It hasn't been easy playing the guessing game as to why God would bring me home all this time either. It has been some huge mystery until now that is. There are few distinct things that have happened in the last month that have made me have to sit back and go... wow. If I was still in Fiji, that would not have happened. After jumping on deck with Matt Silver in Student Ministries I got heavily involved. I went to the Pennsylvania Christian Teen Convention with the youth group the day after 3 long days of travel. I started going to all of the meetings, and hanging out with a bunch of students. I then got to spend some time on another trip to Camp Tockwogh to take those relationships to even the next level. While returning from that trip I had a conversation with a student I had taken under my wing for years. He had decided to have me baptize him that very next day at youth group. That very youth group that just so happened to be my very first time speaking the message. Matt had given me the privilege to speak to over 150 students that night about Faith in a world full of Pain. I felt at home. I knew that was what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Also lining up in my life at the same time was the unexpected adventure that is who I will call Jeff. Jeff was a guy in my small group that I was leading in conjunction with youth group. Jeff told me that he wasn't sure if he was going to make it to all of our meetings because he was going to be homeless in two weeks. This his me hard, and I did everything in my power to find Jeff a home for two solid weeks before landing him an incredible home with a woman to love him like a Mom can the day he lost his home. This may be a small thing to me, or a small thing to you, but now Jeff has a home. If I had denied God in returning home, Jeff would most likely be "on his way back to lock-up" in the quote directly from him. He has a clean slate and new chance at life that he wouldn't have had before. But holy cow it doesn't stop there. So to even go beyond the sermon or the baptism or even Jeff, another blessing was set in my lap to only reaffirm how crazy God is. As you are all very aware of by now, it was quite a blow learning about Matt Silver leaving CCV. That is the man that picked me up when I was lost. He invested so much time in me. He became my friend and he brought me to Christ no matter what it took. It was only 5 short years ago that Matt Silver Changed my life forever, and now he will be moving to a new place. I could only imagine what it would have been like to come back from Fiji and know that Matt had already left. So I find out the day after finding out about Matt, and the day after finding Jeff a home that the church is hiring interns. As you could guess I jumped at the opportunity, and I can't even explain how happy I am to be able to work at CCV. I get to do what I love, with the people I love, for the people I love. None of this would have happened if it wasn't for absolutely blind obedience. It's weird how the puzzle pieces are kind of beginning to put themselves in place a little. I am sure that I will never quite understand why God does what he does. But seeing some answers to some real big questions is really showing me to never doubt, even when everyone else does. It has been next to impossible to try to break down the most eventful month of my life down to a few paragraphs, but I hope by reading this you can have a little idea of why I'm here, and where I'm going. And if you get an idea of where I'm going, let me know. Because I'm pretty much winging it. God is so good. Trust him with everything. It will turn out alright, I promise. Maybe not now, maybe not soon, but when you hand over control, you can't lose...

So What Did Happen In Fiji?

So, the infamous question that seems to always come up time and time again. I think to try fully explain the yearnings God has put on my heart throughout this process would almost sell Him short. As most of you already know when I left for Fiji I was incredibly sick. I was running 104 degrees throughout the whole flight to L.A. and remained ill for the following 3 grueling days of traveling to Sau Bay which was to be my final resting place until May 21st. The first week there, which included by 21st birthday was one of incredible discomfort and hardship. To be completely honest that first week, I did want to come right home. However that feeling didn't last long. After becoming acclimated with the weather and different environment, along with becoming family with the other students instantly made my whole life easier. I can't tell you a time when I felt so dependent on God. We lived off of the land and off of each other. We spent the majority of our time chatting about God, playing with large knives, hiking, snorkeling, kayaking, worshiping and throwing coconuts around the compound. It was incredible, I was home... As you can all guess this wasn't the end for me however. God put something on my heart as heavy as a brick. It's that feeling that something definately isn't right, but I'm not sure what. Some may say I just let emotions get the best of me. But this was so much bigger than that. This was something real, and I was more than willing to listen. After approaching the director I was instructed to take time and really think about all of this. I spent that week in prayer, in the word, and even in quiet meditation down on the beach, trying to understand what God was asking of me. And it was very clear to me all at once that God wanted me at home. This was not easy for me to grasp or understand. It was so hard to get to that place to begin with that I thought that there was no way God would take me out of here if only He was the reason I was there to begin with. But it was clear. This has happened in my life before, I can only explain it as something that happens to you between a feeling and a vision. Either way, blindly I followed what God had asked of me. The hardest part was knowing that this wasn't possible without opposition. I feel as if everyone there made it incredibly difficult to make that decision, but in the end I submitted and followed God home. By the time I had actually gotten off the island I spent about a month there, and it was the most life changing month of my life. I don't regret going, and I am sure I was there for a reason, I could name hundreds of possible reasons. But for whatever which reasons God called me to be in Collegeville, Pennsylvania for the time being, so here I stay, only to be finally getting some answers now. You must know this is the incredibly abbreviated version. Some of the specifics are still kind of painful to talk about to be honest. It is something I will carry with me forever, and the journey continues....